Dying to know end-of-life wishes

NORMALISING discussions about death, end-of-life choices and care, the Dying to Know Day campaign has been marked by local health services, their patients, and carers this week.

Recent data from Palliative Care Victoria has revealed most people across the state think conversations surrounding death and dying matter, but in the last year, nearly 50 per cent of them had rarely or never discussed this with their loved ones.

Grampians Region Palliative Care Consortium chair Peter Armstrong said such conversations are important ones, but are not happening as often as they should.

“We used to talk about death as a natural part of life. We prepared and planned for a time without us or without our loved ones. This is a conversation of love with those who matter most to us,” he said.

“This year on Dying to Know Day, the Groundswell Project encouraged people to bring back those open, honest conversations about death.”

In the region a number of organisations, including Ballarat Hospice Care and Central Grampians Palliative Care, have teamed up to distribute 1000 Ballarat-made ‘time to talk’ biscuits aimed at encouraging people to start a discussion.

The groups have also suggested people sign up to the Australian organ and tissue donor register and share their end-of-life wishes with close family members and friends.

Grampians Region Palliative Care Consortium manager Anna Gray is asking people to speak up, having had a “very near-death experience” in 2020 as a single parent of three adolescents.

“I had previously had discussions with them, just in case, believing it to be completely non-contextual,” she said.

“But people in my situation wouldn’t necessarily normally have those conversations, so you need to let your families know. It’s not just a conversation for people over a certain age, those in palliative care, or with a chronic illness; it’s for everyone.

“Religious or family traditions used to predetermine what death rituals would be, but with the movement away from faith and churches, they become much less black and white, so choices, like burial or cremation, become very real.”

Ballarat Hospice Care CEO Carita Clancy said the topic of conversation can be challenging, requiring sensitivity, but “the fact is, dying is a part of life.”

“Having the time to talk about life and death is a gift, it is a time to share our hopes, fears, dreams and wishes,” she said.

“If we do not take the opportunity to understand what is important to each person, we cannot be sure we are honouring their individual choices.”