Time to connect

In 2022, the Sydney Brain and Mind Institute ran a national survey with Australian parents.

The most startling revelation was that on average parents are spending only 18 seconds per day in meaningful conversation with their son or daughter. It’s a tough statistic to hear! It’s not enough!

A lot of times, we are present but not truly present. Like, we’re physically sitting here, spending time with our families, but our attention is elsewhere.

Maybe it’s our minds wandering about work, last night’s game, or tomorrow night’s dinner. Maybe it’s mindless scrolling, none of which is actually that important.

Regardless, I’ve never heard a mum or dad say building solid relationships isn’t important to them. While we all go about it in different ways, we inherently understand that forming these relationships with our kids leads to general happiness that is almost impossible to replicate without.

That happiness isn’t solely about them; it’s about you too! Spending quality time with our kids has extensive benefits for them, but Dads who spend more quality time with their children see major improvements in their lives, including lowered blood pressure and heart rate, improved sleep quality and increased duration, and several more.

Unfortunately, many of us struggle with taking that first step, thinking we need grand gestures or big gifts to build lifelong relationships. This is never the case, the memories behind great relationships are often built by millions of tiny moments that are so insignificant that they are unworthy of being repeated in story form. Still, when put together, they lead to a lifechanging relationship we can be proud of.

More often than not, it’s quality time our kids are looking for. Thankfully, as parents we can all deliver that!.

Here’s a few simple ideas to start making quality time today.

Play a game

Board games, sports games, computer games; you name it. There are endless options to choose from when incorporating games into your quality time. The rules are almost irrelevant when creating lifelong memories with the family.

Go for a walk

I love a good walk. If you have a dog, walk the dog together or maybe just a stroll to the local coffee shop, get outside together. It could be around the block or a bit longer. In addition to the exercise, getting outside and having a conversation is a great way to connect. The loudest moments are often the simplest.

Make a meal together

Making a meal with kids is the perfect activity. In addition to being productive, the kids are almost always engaged in what you’re doing.

Have a heart-to-heart

Vulnerability is at the center of any healthy relationship. The issue is, somewhere in our past, many of us were taught that vulnerability is a weakness not to be shown. We deserve to be honest with ourselves and the people around us and pass that vulnerability to the next generation. “How was your day?” is unlikely to yield much of a response other than “Good.”

Ask about their dreams, fears, and even things like their music, subjects, sports, etc. A heart-to-heart doesn’t need to be an emotional event each time. It’s all about asking intentional questions and listening intently.

These small moments are the moments that count and they are the one’s your kids will remember! They are also the one’s that will help support today’s youth to face the challenges that confront them and the ones that will empower them with the courage to thrive!

Taking the time to connect is a powerful thing, for them and for you!

Don’t miss the chance!

Scott Watters is the founder of the LifeChanger Foundation, which empowers thousands of young people in Australia and New Zealand with the courage to thrive, through preventative youth mental health programs.

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