How to Support Someone in Hospital: What to Bring & What to Say

The Australian Institute of Health and Welfare reports that the number of admitted patient hospitalisations has increased over the past decade. From 2014-15 to 2023-24, the number increased from 10.2 million to 12.6 million.

Statistics also show that in some states, the average length of stay for admitted patients is increasing as well. For example, overnight patients admitted to New South Wales public hospitals are staying 12.5% longer on average compared to pre-pandemic numbers.

Hospital stays, even at the best of times, can be physically and emotionally taxing. If you have a friend or family member in the hospital, visiting them can help their mood and recovery.

That being said, it’s natural to have questions about what to do or bring when supporting a loved one in the hospital. This article covers everything you need to know, from finding the perfect gift, like a get well soon hamper, to how to raise their spirits.

Why it matters

Before delving into what to say or bring when visiting a friend or family member in the hospital, it’s important to understand why it matters. Supporting someone in the hospital can have a significant impact on their stay and recovery. 

Research shows that a family member being able to visit in person for people in the intensive care unit is important for patient well-being and recovery. This is because they’re able to provide comfort and security, decreasing the patient’s stress and anxiety.

In general, hospitalisation is a stressful time for patients, and visitor support can help minimise the impact. In a study interviewing 238 patients, 98% of the patients with visitors reported that having someone there improved their overall well-being and satisfaction.

Research shows that even while patients sleep, the presence of a family member or friend is still beneficial and helps empower them. So, whether you’re planning to just drop by and chat or bring in games to play together, it all helps.

Even if you can’t physically visit the person in the hospital, there are other alternatives too. The same research also shows that when in-person visits aren’t possible, like during COVID, video calls can still help reduce patient distress and provide support.

Things you can bring

If you have a friend or family member staying in the hospital, there are a few things you can bring to help support their recovery and empower them. Below is a list of the different items you can bring along. 

Clothing

Research has shown there is a link between hospital gowns and patients’ feeling dehumanised, distressed, and vulnerable. Results found that patients wearing hospital gowns reported feeling significantly more dehumanised than patients wearing their clothes.

If you’re planning a visit to a loved one in the hospital, it’s worth asking them if they want any of their clothes (e.g., day clothes, night clothes, and underwear). It can help them feel more ‘human’ and comfortable during their stay.

Get-well gifts

A get-well gift, such as a care package, a handwritten card, or flowers, is a thoughtful way to support a loved one in the hospital. Not only is it a fantastic way to brighten their day and show you care, but it can also help decorate and add to their hospital room.

A good book

Best said by Hendrik Henrikson, “Every book is a new portal to a different world.” Reading can provide an escape into a new world, which might just be what your loved one needs. If you’re not sure what book might be best for them, you could ask them about their favourite author or genre. 

Food

It’s no secret that hospital food is average at the best of times. As the saying goes, life is better with friends and delicious bites, so when you visit your loved one in the hospital, try to bring them their favourite foods. Just make sure to check beforehand that you’re allowed to bring in food, and if there are any dietary restrictions.

Self-care items

Especially for emergency hospitalisations, most patients don’t have the time to gather their belongings, such as self-care items, for long stays. Offering to bring in items, like deodorant, shampoo, and lip balm, can help your loved one feel more human and bring a sense of normalcy.

What to say

It’s normal to feel unsure about what you can/can’t say to someone when they’re in the hospital, but try not to overthink it too much. First of all, you’re there to visit your loved one in the hospital—focus on their anxieties and how to support them, not yours.  

Regardless of what you say or do, your loved one is also probably just going to appreciate your presence. Try to act as naturally as possible, supportive, and if you’re still unsure of what to do or say, you can always ask how they’d prefer to be supported.

Be there for them

Most importantly, when you visit a friend or family member in the hospital, be there for them. That means giving them your full attention, actively listening, and letting them vent or rant if they need to.

There are different ways you can be there for a loved one. This could be just spending quality time with them, bringing in a video game the two of you can play together, or just staying the night so they have someone there for them through the night.

Let them take the lead

If you’re not feeling confident about what to say or do, let your loved one take the lead. Asking them what they want to do shows consideration and thoughtfulness. It also gives them more control in an environment where they might feel powerless.