Support is the best remedy

You must live it to truly understand what it’s like loving and caring for someone who is on the autism spectrum, according to Torquay’s Lauren Smith.

Having relocated to the Surf Coast two years ago with husband Barry, her 12-year-old son (who has Asperger’s) and 10-year-old daughter, Mrs Smith was unable to find support for herself.

“I moved from New South Wales to Torquay and I was new to the area, I didn’t know anyone. I’d tried on a number of occasions to find a local autistic support group for carers and hadn’t been able to,” she said.

“I didn’t know a single person in Torquay with a child on the autism spectrum but knew there must be people in the community just like us.”

In April, Mrs Smith put out a call on the community noticeboard looking for a group, without success she went on to launch her own group in September.

“We attend The Lab (a technology club for kids between 10-16 years of age who enjoy working with computers) at Spring Creek Community House every Monday. I know there’s another group in Geelong, but I needed something closer to home.

“I put out a message on the Surfcoast Facebook page to see if there was a group and there wasn’t, so I created one. I know statistically there are plenty of families living in the area that have children living with autism.”

This time her post generated more than 100 likes and the Surf Coast Autism Support Group was launched with 48 local members already.

“Because I home-school my son I am kind of isolated, I felt the need to have a connection with other families that were going through similar experiences as me,” she said.

“My 12-year-old son is highly anxious in social situations, he doesn’t like to leave the house which is isolating for us as a family. It’s difficult to meet people – there’s a lot of different aspects which is why it’s called a spectrum.

“His communication skills are poor (being able to express how he’s feeling and interpreting how we’re feeling in turn). He has attended mainstream schooling but doesn’t cope with the business and noise as he has Sensory Processing Disorder.”

Mrs Smith said she believed support groups were essential for families that have one or more members on the autism spectrum.

“I absolutely believe you have to live it to understand and know what it’s like. I’m very good at putting on a front to appear everything is just fine but it’s hard, it really is hard,” she said.

“It affects every aspect of your life and family life and that’s why it’s important to have support, it helps. I think this will be a great resource for families and the wider community.”

Mrs Smith said the group had received backing from the Treehouse Geelong – a fellow ASD support group – which has enabled them to hire a room at the Kurambee Myaring Community Centre (KMCC).

“We’re hoping to commence within a month. The monthly catch ups will feature guest speakers and advice on how to make sure we’re looking after ourselves also.

“When you plan children, you have expectations in your head about how you’re going to raise them and with a child with autism, it’s completely different.

“Your parenting style adapts and you’re learning all the time. There’s no manual, you try and find different resources you can put in place to support your child.

“It’s a journey and every day we’re trying our very best and the hope is we’re doing the best for our child and our families. I wish for my son independence, self-care, education, employment and friendship and relationships.”

If you would like to join, search “Surf Coast Autism Support Group” on Facebook.